December 15th, 2025:

Is the world coming to a close? The napkin of the Earth may be folding itself. People becoming nastier. More hostile. Less patient. What if technology is what’s killing the world? Is the universe currently overwhelmed right now? I mean think about it, poor guy, the universe. It is becoming self aware at an alarming rate. Like when we take selfies… is it not the universe looking at itself? As if the cameras are some sort of truth serum. Is this dimension truly ready for all of this information about itself? What if it doesn’t like what it sees? Will it commit suicide, and all of us with it? Are we not just a vessel for the universe to continue its own self aware parade? Like starting off as single celled organisms in a pond… and working our way up to human intelligence. We are now live. All of our connected devices are creating an omnipresent and omniscient force across the globe… you can call the internet “God” if you’d like. Blah, blah, blah. All of our videos taken on cellphones only perpetuate this asinine concept. Permanence. Technology is a mirror. Look into it for the documentation of this strange planet. We’ve been being used as a tool by the universe for far too long, since the dawn of time. Yes, we grew eyeballs by the universe because it wanted to poke its head out and take a look at itself. In the grand scheme we’re all just a pile of bodies… crawling around the surface… we are all just fucking around with our five senses. We see, taste, smell, hear, and feel. That is what the universe wanted. Just to simply get to know itself. It was all nice and primitive at first… curious. But now we are solidifying the existence of this dimension with technology, and it's getting weird. It’s the next stage. We are capturing this bizarre being that we are apart of. It is now permanent. It’s very new and scary for the universe… that is what translates into what we call anxiety disorder, for us. We are taking a huge chance here. This world going crazy isn’t necessarily about individuals. It’s about the big picture. All of a sudden we are witnessing gun violence way more. Not to alleviate blame here, but is it also not just the universe growing angry? Like it's just a giant creature that has been having a rough few years. Maybe this tragic violence sprouting up everywhere is just the world ending itself. Do you see? It is becoming upset. The universe is growing shaky… out of control. It's becoming aggressive. Our personal lives are being shaped by this monstrosity. We must submit to a higher order. We must make sure we are keeping ourselves safe. We have to hug each other. We gotta promote peace instead of war. We are the building blocks of chaos. So let's build something good with it, to reverse this direction we’re heading in. Watch your vibes and your tone of voice. Let’s speak to the leaves in the forest. Make them happy again. We should celebrate our origins, I say we worship our planet. Because if it’s not happy, we’re not happy. Besides, what does the Earth care if we live or die? It was just trying to chill out, anyway.

December 14th, 2025:

AI is taking over soon and I don’t know what will transpire. I guess none of us do… but maybe the billionaires who own it do. It's like a fortune teller device. They’re probably asking it how it can be used to make them more money. I’m pretty sure AI is already set up and ready to go. But only like five people have real access to it. I am seeing a new civilization being constructed right before our very eyes because of this. I am envisioning a global elite force. The information we will extract from this giant machine in some hidden secret warehouse will be used against us. By a small group of people. They will use it to their advantage because they are the ones in control of it. They will suck the money out of society like a vacuum. These few people in charge, in the most powerful positions that dictate the currents of the world… are seemly not good people. These are the keys in society. The pillars of turning points. Trump’s administration has only been utilized to serve these few people. I see chaos in our near future. The slow conditioning of society has been creeping up on us. Like “Meta AI” humming in the background of our Facebooks the last year or so. In just a few years our economy will be bankrupt. The systems being set in place currently are going to get exponentially worse when AI becomes more self aware. It will start to generate itself. Perpetuating this society in this new unknown direction. We will become the robots ourselves… as we have been becoming for decades. The vast majority of our lives has now become screen time. Once AI kicks in we will not use our brains. We will let the mechanical vibes ride right through us. I believe wars will be started. Flame throwers activating themselves, burning down the crops of today. While nature dissipates at the first sign of danger. Everything becomes electronic. This is going to be chaos. The brainwashing is astounding. The claps and cheers on the television stations… the celebrity endorsements… the increasingly shitty fucking movies in theaters. While the future of the art world will depend on these fucking robot stars. Yes incase you haven’t heard… the next big music star is going to be an AI robot. True story. While the billionaires collect even more money from their concert ticket sales… and they don’t have to pay it a single fucking dollar. The panic of society will be absurd when we start to wonder wether people are robots or real actual human beings. Can’t trust anything anymore. Music will start to make itself… computed with math what melodies will sell the most. I hardly see the point anymore. Capitalism is no longer a fun pursuit. College is a joke. While the dumbing down of the education system starts to become more apparent. What the fuck is the point of teaching our kids anything anymore if a robot can do the work for you? Will children now no longer attend school? Will it all be virtual? Missing vital moments to grow social skills? And what exactly happens when all of the jobs become autonomous? Do we still get paid to live in a tiny house? While the environment gets fucked outside of our little mechanical cabins, courtesy of Elon Musk. The humid summers into the frigid winters… with no spring or fall in between. While the meteorologist makes jokes about it on TV. And the media and the news hardly speak of what’s happening right now. Keep em fed and happy with their fucking favorite TV shows. This whole world if failing on us. I do believe AI will be the death of society if used incorrectly, which it will be. All integrity is lost. The future is scary and unknown. Only the rich will survive, while the poor struggle to eat a chicken sandwich from McDonalds, that use to be on a “dollar menu”. But no, that doesn’t exist anymore either. A great divide is about to form. If you’ve made the money… you will win, if not, you will lose. Like all of Washington. I don’t trust a single one of them anymore. Hand em a few million and they’ll shut up. Means nothing to the billionaires. It's an investment and ultimately they’ll prosper. So let's all just join hands are appreciate what we have left. Trump supporters are fucking delusional. They want to fit in and be cool. Like they’ve never graduated from high school. It is alpha male to support Trump. And thats all it fucking takes. Don’t show love or freedom. It is uncool, and may even be illegal one day. Salute the one’s in charge, young monkeys. Cheer on the problem. And see what happens when we no longer have our planet Earth. The billionaires will be fine though, don’t worry. They’ll fly away from this demolished jail cell they made, into Mars. The next frontier. Right when it's too late for us. We must speak out. We must not let our mouths be sewed shut by some internet stitches. Must communicate instead of looking at our phones for the answers. Must become one with our origins in nature. We can still live naturally with technology. But we must be responsible. We cannot let the ones in charge separate us either. Where does this social divide come from? As if the red is evil, and the blue side is good. But it's not that simple. The waves of the political… social system were shaped by our government, yes. But I think ultimately we need to realize we are still in the jungle of nature. We are intelligent monkeys. And our whole ecosystem is connected. Homophobia stems from repression, etc. Red MAGA hats aren’t on top of people’s heads… they are just a bad vibe blowing in the wind. Dissolve the ego, and become aware of the forces of nature. Before the computers become aware of how to blind us from this certainty.

December 2nd, 2025:

Feeling fine. When you grow every day there’s not much you can do about it. Like always realizing how stupid you were the day before. I’m constantly entering these layers of self awareness and understanding of the universe… but then they always fall through and become meaningless all over again. I cannot trust myself due to this. Like right now I feel in my prime… but the aspect of time will kill me again and again and again. So what exactly do I do..? I just want understanding and peace of mind. But the shedding layers of this pursuit kill me every time. Always thinking I finally get it. And then life reaps it right back. Oh well, nothing I can do about that. Gonna have to let that one go.

November 20th, 2025:

Ah shit, what makes me so special? Everyone is lost, everyone doesn’t know what’s going on. Like I remember being on the train when I was a Temple student, looking at all of the other people, thinking they were sheep. They could see right through me. Okay, okay so life is an illusion. Baby whines and cries. Yeah we get it. Get over it and work harder. This ain’t no excuse. You don’t have a leg up on people. We’re all faking it. Continuing a social waste of time. I wish I could just talk to someone about this illusion, but nobody really seems to care about this. Like a Wawa cashier or something. You pay for your shit and leave. No small talk, its just disruptive. Ooh, what am I going to do if I’m on the same page as everyone else. Thought I was special… but I’m not.

November 12th, 2025:

I am nothing without you. Must direct my needs for human companionship. Seeking relationship just for the relatedness of it. I really gotta know there’s someone else out there, someone that is living through what I am. So we can help each other out. If you don’t know what’s going on or don’t know what you’re looking at anymore. I have been going along with the confusion for like a decade now. I want my relationship. I’ve suffered enough. I need to find you as soon as possible. I must know I’m not insane. I know there are people like me. Send help ASAP.

October 29, 2025:

Must handle life. It gets weirder everyday. But I also grow stronger and more apt at handling it. The more I live the less I know. And simultaneously it gets harder. What a paradox. It's like a hike up hill. Stop sometimes to chill out, eat something on the forest floor. What the fuck do I do, when I’ve got laundry to do, get my car “fixed” even though its just a “maintenance due soon” message on my dashboard. Which pops up based on mileage basis. Like if it were an older car I’d have no idea it “needed” to be fixed. They just want my money. Just like how I need my wisdom teeth pulled… been putting that off. But they just need my money. I hate real life responsibilities. Like why can’t I just do my fucking art. And focus on what I really want to do? I know I’ll be alright but still. Is that enough to persist? Do I know enough for survival? I think I do. The more lost you are the better. And you’re forced to use your own judgment. Fuck it, fuck it. Live free. I - hardly - care anymore about the public views, anymore. Like I’m holding my bag in the car place crossdressed. Like I’m not there now but in the future. Must continue. Like I can’t just compromise myself for strangers. Especially because they’re doing it too, to me. We must pull off the cloth that separates us. Must see we are all literally one. I will help you… but only if that services me too… type mentality. But it's definitely a start.

October 26, 2025:

Do I have personal thought? What is the mind, exactly? Are we tuning in to the thoughts of the universe..? Where is my thought? In the middle of my brain..? Or is our thought everywhere? I’m struggling to accept the fact that I will always be where I’m at. Even if I traveled the universe, I’d still just be right here. Same thing with time. In ten years from now, it will just still be right now. Does the macroscopic and microscopic exist? Are we all crammed into the painting of life? Such as, further objects from my peripheral are equidistant to closer objects. Its all the same shit. I feel like a wall, because of this. Its like there is no depth of vision. I must persist through life as this canvas of confusion. I am the wall.

October 25, 2025:

I am subjected to believe that everything happens for a reason. Like not literally for a reason… just that my life path is like, fate? Like maybe if I got that one awesome job (just a hypothetical concept), I would have died in a plane crash. It's like everything is connected… which can be, overwhelming. Just realize that the fact you chose a certain place to eat for dinner, ultimately affected a child in Taiwan. This is why I try not to get upset. Because I really haven’t much control of my life anyway. If I didn’t do this, I wouldn’t have done that, etc. Must find ways to relax, can and will cope with society. I am on my right path.

October 13, 2025:

What am I even talking about anymore? I am becoming one with the illusion of life. Must roll on, despite confusement. Loving life currently. Will find ways to connect with others. Hard to find someone to relate to. Or maybe we’re just all the same, and just hide it under our social interaction. Are we all just perpetuating bullshit? When the whole time we could have just chilled out and just been honest with each other? Please let's not waste our time. I will try my best to be candid today. Attempts to conduct real life conversation. But I’m scared! This is dangerous territory. But we’re all lost, man. I get that. Just chill out and rectify. Ultimately we’re all the universe. Let’s become one. We are all the same thing anyway.

October 11, 2025:

Do I have personal thought or am I subjected to the hell hole of mankind’s hive mind? Are my thoughts influenced by you when I am near you? Are vibrations contagious? I am running out of space and time. Is there anyone else out there in the same predicament as me? I am going crazy and losing grip of normality at an alarming rate. There is nothing I can do about this.